The cemetery

I will be the first one to say I don't go out to his grave site very often. I could probably count on both hands how many times I've gone. I'm not sure if i would go more if he was buried closer or not. Right now he is about 20 minutes away. We've haven't even bought a grave stone yet because we always talk about moving him to our town we live in but I'm not sure if that would really change me going out there to visit.
I know many people close to me that love going to their loved ones grave site. It's therapeutic for them. Even my husband likes going, but to me he's not really there so why go. I feel more at peace looking through photos and watching videos of him. Even at the holidays we have a tree to go out there that lights up but didn't even put it out last year. It sounds horrible but I forgot. Don't get me wrong I never forget about Elias, not one day goes by that I don't talk about him or see him through the kids. Life just gets busy. It might sound weird to people especially those that have lost a loved one. I had our 3rd son before the year anniversary of Elias passing. Our life really couldn't stop with an older son also. Believe me, we celebrate his life everyday. We still go and have a birthday dinner and even have pictures with him. (yes, you heard me.;)) We did have a little birthday celebration at the cemetery for his 1st birthday.
I guess you can say there is no right way or wrong way to visiting or not visiting your loved one at the cemetery. As long as you can get through living after a loss you are doing what's right for you.
God Bless